Stick A Spork In You, You're Done
by CHAILYN
Summary: A fic for Fiona. sam and dean come up agaisnt the most evil thing imagainable but can't defeat it without the help of some brillant and cracked up female hunters. pure crack.


**Stick A Spork In You, You're Done

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Fi, I wrote this fic for you but I'm a bit dissapointed in it, I don't think I gave it the justice such a crak-if-ic idea deserved. and for anyone who wants to read some really awesome fics, check out supernaturalsammy67's cos the girl can write me under the table!**

_**And squeals for the news! SPN has been renewed for a 4th season as of 3/3/08!!!!**_

_**Disclaimer: Don't be silly, of course i own sn, the boys, and all of it.

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They were hunting the worst, the terrible, the unthinkable...and to get right down to it, plain scary.

"No sudden movements." Fiona warned the boys, worried that this just might be too much for them to handle.

Sam and Dean had gone to the only two hunters that knew how to handle such a horriffic monster.

Fiona and Courtney.

"You boys better ready yourslef for a whole lot of ugly." Fiona continued, "This kind of thing, its practically unstoppable. And _we're _the only ones who can defeat it."

"How?" Dean couldn't help but to feel like this was a complete overreaction but he had to trust these girls, they'd never led him astray before.

Fiona handed both of them guns. "Don't lose 'em." She warned them, "Its the only hope we have to stop it."

"What is it?" Sam asked, it wasn't any kid of gun he'd seen ever before.

Fiona's voice dropped to barely a whisper, "The killer..._meatloaf_...can only be stopped with a...sporkgunner."

Sam nearly dropped it as he looked up at her. She looked serious, she sounded serious...but no freakin' way she could _be _serious.

Dean had a matching look on his face, they were nuts. This entire hunt was nuts, he was just about positive that maybe the report was just fodder for _Weekly World News, _and that they should just leave crazy female hunters and their sporkguns be.

"They've got the look." Courtney said, shaking her head sadly, "Why Fi, I think they think we're just nuts."

"Of course we're not." Fiona replied, "Its the squirrels who are nuts. Boys, have we ever led you astray on a hunt? Ever been wrong?"

Sam and Dean searched for an occasion and try as they may they couldn't find one. Thenit occured to Dean.

"The time...with the field mouse, in Philly...you shot little Mickey point blank." Dean said, "You said he was pure evil, remember? Something about stealing things and mocking the mindless..."

"He did!" Fiona replied defensively. "And you're acting like he was one of the cute little disney mice. He was like a sewer rat...and he did. Stole my sandwich."

Sam rolledhis eyes, how did Dean find these people?

"Now, do you boys want our help or not?" Courtney asked, "Because if you're just gonna make fun of us..."

"No." Dean shook his head, "Nope...please, we're sorry. Fi, Courtney, please help us?"

Damn it, Dean hated apologizing. Those girls were lucky that they were so golden though because otherwise..he'd want to have them committed. As far as hunters went though, they were the best. Though, it was always the crazy stuff...barbies and killer food...were did they find it?

Sam liked Fiona, and very rearely didn't not trust her opinion as she was a bit of a genius but...killer meatlovaves and spork guns seemed to be going a bit over board.

"Well," Fiona said, cocking her sporkgun, "Lets go and get this ugly SOB, before it permanantly ruins my appetite."

**0000000000**

Dean wondered if you could apologize to people after you die.

The meat loaf was terrifying.

Dean screamed as he was squirted with meat juice, no one had prepared him for such a horror. It was hideous...it was going to try and make him eat it.

He quivered in fear as the small little brown loaf of ground beef and spices backed both him and his brother into a tree.

"What's a meatloaf doing in the woods?" Sam asked.

Both had lost their sporkguns in the shuffle and were defenseless.

The smell was overpowering, worst than burnt flesh .

Dean had just about accepted his fate as it crawled past his feet with a nasty squelching sound, when the girls came to the rescue.

Dean held his breath as he saw the two plastic sporks flying at them, and released it as they hit the meatloaf the terrifying thing sinking into the ground lifelessly.

"Yeah!" Fiona whooped, "Stick a spork in you, you're done!"

"Champions." Courtney said with a smug grin as they eyed up the boys who still looked as if their lives had flashed by their eyes.

"Champions." Fiona agreed, "Now...I told you so didn''t I, its right bloody terrifying."

Sam and Dean nodded their heads wordlessly.

"I say we torch the sucker, and get some coffee." Courtney said.

"And pie." Fiona added, "Pie and coffee."

Dena started to agree when a sight behind them caught his eye. His eyes widened in fear, and Sam matched his look of fright equally.

"What?" Fiona asked, "You boys don't like pie and coffee?"

Dean pointed behind them.

They turned and saw it. It was worse than the unstoppable meatloaf. It was...the homemade bread.

Both girls screamed in fear and all four ran for their lives. They weren't equipped for such evil.

"Shoot it!" Dean yelled as they ran.

"It won't do a damn thing!" Fiona yelled back.

"Thing's hard as a rock." Courtney said, "The sporks just bounce right off!"

"Well, shoot it with a regular gun." Sam said.

"That won't scratch it." Fiona said, "Friggin' bread...I hate running!" She yelled back at it.

"Well how do we kill the killer bread?" Sam asked.

"We drowned it once," Fiona said, "But I don't think its stupid enough to follow us into a lake again."

"Wait." Dean stopped.

"Dean!" They all yelled in unison.

Oh right, he had forgotten that they were running from killer bread. Damn, these girls needed to hunt normal things.

"Well, what do we do?" Sam asked, slightly out of breath and glad they were almost to the car.

Fiona suddenly got an idea. "Squirrels!" She yelled, "Squirrels, its gotta be the squirrels."

Sam and Dean looked confused.

"Its brillant." Courtney looked at her in awe. "Squirrels, they'll eat anything. Even an evil loaf of bread can't top the evil that the squirrels are capable of."

They took their guns and shot into the trees above them.

Squirrels came running out and both girls blanched.

"RUN!" They screamed in unison, "They'll eat you alive!"

The foursome dove into the Impala.

"Close call." Fiona said looking out the window to see them attack the bread, "Looks like--AHHHHHH!"

Fiona flew backwards in fear as a squirrel jumped at the window.

Dean saw and screamed, but for a slightly different reason..not his car!

They sped off putting the most terrifying hunt of their lives in their rear-view mirror.

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End file.
